FootyTech

“Here, Rodders, take a look at these footballs. I got 24 boxes of em off Micky down the market, top quality they are.”

“But Derrick, you don’t even like football”

“These Rodders are state of the art, they’ve got a grip and groove texture on the surface that gives unmatched flight characteristics, it’s the most stable and most accurate Adidas ball ever.”

“How do you know that Derrick?”

“It says so on the box Roddney you plonker.”

“Let me have a look at those. These are a bit heavy aren’t they?”

“That’s what gives them their extra stability Rodders, they’re proper cushty! These things are going to sell like hot cakes, they’re sold by Nelson Mandela!”

“Derrick, we live in Nelson Mandela Towers, that’s not the same thing.”

“This time next year Rodders, we’ll be millionaires! Luvley Jabulani!”

“Del, these are rugby balls.”

—

Buy an Adidas Jabulani, or an Adidas Jabulani Replica (But not from the Trotters! )

Watch the Adidas Jabulani being made.

Nike Ascente football

Hot on the heals of Adidas and their new UEFA footballs, Nike have announced their new T90 Ascente, which is the official match ball for The FA Premier League, La Liga & Serie A.

It boasts:

• 360 Degree Sweetspot
• Longer Range
• Increased Visibility
• Higher accuracy
• Greater speed

but what does all that mean? Well the 360 degree sweetspot means that wherever you hit the ball it’s performance is consistent, which is kind of what you’d expect unless you buy one of those weighted joke balls.

Longer range, the T90 Ascente can travel 2 WHOLE ball lengths further than the Nike Omni … so watch out for those windows behind the nets!

Increased visibility, the pattern on the ball apparently creates a flicker effect that means you can see from all over the pitch. Which would be a good thing.

Higher accuracy, these bad boys have been tested in wind tunnels and the air flows much more smoothly across the surface of the ball, it also dips more sharply over defensive walls.

The T90 Ascente flies a whole 2.4% faster than the old Omni, and I’m going to choose the balls 3 layers as the culprit for this blazing increase.

If you’d like to buy one, they’re £84.99 from Kitbag.com

UEFA have extended their deal with Adidas who will now supply match balls for all 3 club cup competitions that UEFA run.

Firstly, Adidas have design this football for the Supercup Final which is to take place in Monaco on August 28th between Barcalona & Shaktar Donesk.

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